Big Complaints

Bizarro is brought to you by Environmental Catastrophes.

I've seen a lot of cartoons on the BP spill but I've not seen this done. My friend, Richard Cabeza, had this idea and I really like it.

I'm not going to discuss the spill much other than to say it is a heartbreaking catastrophe of our own making. An even larger catastrophe is commercial fishing in the past 100 years. Experts estimate as much as 90% of large fish are gone from he oceans as a result. The ocean is the weather engine of the planet. We screw that up, the whole thing implodes.

On a slightly different note, I found a YouTube video of a Texas guy calling Jimmy Dean Sausage to complain. It is hilarious, tragic, and says a lot about what's wrong with us. Don't know whether to laugh or cry.

It has a lot of what many people consider to be "bad language" so I'm only providing the link, as opposed to posting the actual video. Gotta keep my site mostly family friendly.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f4RNb3tt0LM

New This Week: June 23, 2010

What should you look for at the comic shop tomorrow? I'm glad you asked!


Dark Horse have Beasts of Burden: Animal Rites, a collection of the superb mini-series by Evan Dorkin & Jill Thompson, with the earlier short stories from the Dark Horse Book of... anthologies included. These are excellent stories about a group of pets that defend their neighborhood against the supernatural that are thrilling, emotional and a bit scary at times. The art is some of the best of Thompson's career. The miniseries made my Best of 2009 list.


Also from Dark Horse: The Life and Times of Martha Washington in the Twenty-First Century, a massive (600+ pages!) collection of every Martha Washington story by Frank Miller & Dave Gibbons.


IDW serve up the second collection of Thom Zahler's wonderful Love & Capes, one of the best super-hero romantic comedies ever produced, featuring the run-up to Mark & Abby's wedding. The comics included here also made my Best of 2009 list.


Also from IDW: Fallen Angel Omnibus Vol. 0, a large collection of the entire original DC-published Fallen Angel series by Peter David & David Lopez. About half of these comics have never been collected before.


Airship Entertainment have the ninth volume of the popular Girl Genius series by Phil & Kaja Foglio, in both paperback and hardcover editions.

Tough Guy, Ugly Baby, Free Show

Bizarro is brought to you today by Tough Guys.

Writing this cartoon made me wonder how long it will be before there is a "reality" show featuring actual boxers who have to perform feats of dexterity while wearing their gloves. Like typing or tying a shoe. Could happen.
This is one of those silly cartoons that has no particular point to it, which I mentioned in a blog a few days ago.

I suppose you could say the next cartoon is in the same category. I actually got this idea from my sister who recently became a grandmother, not that her grandson looks anything like this. She laughingly said she didn't know if it was genetic programming or what, but she honestly thought her new grandson was the cutest baby she'd ever seen.

It is genetic programming, of course, not just in her case but in the case of all mammals. If we didn't think our babies were cute as hell, nothing would stop us from smothering them the first time they woke us up in the middle of the night screaming. Scientists actually call this "the cute gene," and all species that need care as infants have it. Ones that are capable of surviving on their own the minute they're born aren't "cute," they just look like miniature adults. Snakes are an example. So, probably, was Ann Coulter.

On a happier note, Thursday night here in NYC is an art show at the Bowery Hotel. Performing a couple of live acoustic sets at the show is my friend Rhett Miller, solo artist and front man/singer/songwriter for Old 97s. He's amazing live – very energetic – and his songs are killer good. Go here for info, the show is free and I'll be there with CHNW, for sure. For an additional 40% off the cover charge, tell them Bizarro sent you. As I said, the show is free.

World Cup Confession

Bizarro is brought to you today by the Excitement of the World Cup!!!

I've been watching a bit of the World Cup lately and I'll be honest, I'm having trouble getting into it. I used to play a bit of soccer and enjoyed that, but watching it is dull to me. It's the same game as hockey, which I love, except that in hockey the field is small, the players move quickly, there is lots of action and violence and skill and excitement of all kinds every few seconds. In contrast, soccer seems mostly to be a wide-angle view of a huge park with a lot of similarly dressed people jogging in it.

I know this will irritate soccer fans, sorry about that, and it is the most popular sport in the world so clearly I'm missing something that millions of others see. But I cannot lie to myself any longer. It bores me.

One other thing that I find untenable about soccer is the habit of every player on every team to fall to the ground and fake an injury with all the dramatic skill of a professional wrestler every time they are brushed against. This flies in the face of everything my father taught me about sportsmanship. I find it simultaneously insulting and laughable.

That being said, I hope everyone who enjoys soccer has a jazztown hootenanny good time watching the World Cup this year! Seriously. It's always nice when countries can get together and only pretend to hurt each other.

Rise and Shine!

These polls just kill me. I love you guys. Thanks to your votes, we now know that Miss Sunshine (featured in the previous comic) is:

a bitch (61%)
she's tied as a gossip (29%) and a fake friend (29%)

and lastly, a few of you consider her an airhead (8%)

Stay tuned for more MYTHFITS madness to come. Maybe you'll even affect the outcome of Poo's parasites...

Monkey Covers

Sunday is Monkey Covers day here at YACB. Because there's nothing better than a comic with a monkey on the cover!

Dr. Zaius will not let the humans escape with the ape's secret on the cover to Adventures on the Planet of the Apes #5 (1977) by Rich Buckler & Klaus Janson.

(Standard disclaimer about militaristic apes of the future not really being monkeys applies.)


Image courtesy of the GCD. Click on the image for a larger version.

Super Saturday!

(For the bigness that this cartoon has to offer, click the dang thing.)

Bizarro is brought to you today by Baggy Pants Fashion.

Remember that famous photo of Marilyn Monroe standing over a subway grate with her skirt blowing up? Sadly, that never actually happens in New York but the scene above happens every day. And subway grates aren't the only problem. We don't get a lot of windy thunderstorms here, but on the rare occasion that we do, several young men in clown-sized clothing go missing. Sometimes they show up in Jersey or Connecticut, sometimes they are whisked out to sea, only to wash up on the shore a week later as a fashionably-dressed bloated corpse.

I've participated in some stupid fashions in my day, but none of them lasted as long as the giant-pants fad has. As long as I live, I will never understand it.

On the plus side, it's a guaranteed laugh every time I leave the house.

PLUS!!!

Since it is SuperSaturday, here are a couple of bonus cartoons based on ideas from my buddy, Cliff. He wrote a cool emoticon gag for me a year-or-so ago that ran in Parade Magazine. By using your eyes, you may see it below.










And since I am cartoon rich and cash poor, here is one more bonus cartoon. This one was written by Cliff's son, Nicco, who is 9 or 11 or something like that. Kids say the darnedest things. (And why shouldn't they? The darnedest things happen!!!!)