COLORmation?

This is something I happened upon accidentally which is among the strangest things I've ever seen. It is reportedly from the 1960s (except for the "Something Weird" bumpers) and is amazing in both look and content. I love the blatant sexism and the way Captain Scott hops around like a monkey. The process was apparently called "colormation," which is amusing for obvious reasons.

If the video posted here doesn't work, try this link.

New This Week: October 22, 2008

Been a while since I've done one of these...

If I'm recalling correctly, this is the first time that Secret Invasion and Final Crisis have gone head-to-head, coming out on the same day. But for real fun super-hero comic excitement, I'd put my money on Marvel Adventures Super Heroes #4 by Paul Tobin & Alvin Lee--check out the preview here.

Your other best bet this week is the fifth issue of Kevin Huizenga's Or Else, because by my measure Huizenga's combination of innovation and entertainment places him near the top of today's cartoonists.

Other comics of interest this week include:

The latest in Warren Ellis's Apparat line, Aetheric Mechanics.

The re-issued trade collection of Bryan Talbot's The Adventures of Luther Arkwright.

The seventh issue of Terry Moore's Echo, which I'm enjoying despite its often leisurely pace.


As usual, the full listing of what's due in stores tomorrow can be found on the Comic List Website.

Boot Quaking

Bizarro is made possible today by Fox News Channel's in-depth expose´, "A Fair and Balanced Look at the Race for the White House: Obama the Terrorist-Loving Socialist Baby Killer."

There is no doubt that Fox News Channel is a blight on the country. If it was even remotely disguised as honest journalism with a conservative slant it would be different, but it is quite simply half-truths and complete lies sold as the only "real truth," followed by more complete lies to back up utterly scripted opinions favoring the rich and powerful. It is, in a very real sense, an opiate for the masses, keeping them in line behind the Murdochs, Bushes, and Exxons of the world.

But what can we do about it in a free society? Not much. To shut them down for misleading the country would violate our freedom of speech, which all of us hold dear. But allowing them to perpetuate ignorance, bigotry and jingoism erodes all of our rights and the constitution itself. It's a catch-22 with no end in sight.

On the bright side, judging by the polls and the unprecedented number of people who have donated small amounts to Obama's campaign, I'm tempted to think that most Americans really are smart enough to finally rise up and do something about this trend toward the abyss. Perhaps we really are about to see average people band together and defeat the corporate old-boy network that runs the world. Perhaps on November 4, more people than anyone could have predicted will turn out to vote and McCain will be buried under a landslide of discontent and things will begin to turn around.

Or perhaps the Fox-News-Channel generation of low-info voters will do the same (with the aid of Diebold Republican Voting Machines and crooked precinct captains) and defeat the best chance this country will likely ever have at saving itself from the precipice on which we teter, and all will be lost.

I continue to quake in my boots.

Carpal Knowledge

Bizarro is made possible by a grant from the Peter Fitzperfect and Karrin A. Driveway Foundation.

I love finding new angles on cartoon cliches. Of all the many such cliches in our culture – guy-on-a-desert-island, guy-crawling-through-the-desert, mice-in-a-maze, etc. – the "Tunnel of Love" one is an oddity because I haven't ever seen or heard of an actual Tunnel of Love (that isn't a modern version of the cliche) and suspect they haven't been around in half a century or more. Yet, the romantic carnival attraction remains a well-used cliche in our culture, popping up with fair regularity.

These cliches are no accident, of course. Certain set-ups just lend themselves to commenting on life. The psychiatrist's couch and the gates of Heaven are two perfect examples. You can just say so much about the human condition in those situations.

The "Tunnel of Love" cliche represents the beginning of one of life's many journeys, one that starts out all rainbows and unicorns, but as often as not turns out badgers and amputations. I've seen much better Tunnel of Love cartoons than this one of mine, in fact, I think I've done better ones myself, but I like the wordplay of this one, combined with the image of the person with a computer in a boat.

Great Cartoon

I just love this comic by Ted Rall. One of those wish-I'd-written-it sort of gags.

Slug the Terrorists

(Click image to make it oh-so biggerer)

Bizarro is brought to you today by the Association of Photographers of Exceptionally Questionable Taste.

I cannot tell you how happy I am that this current presidential election is not primarily about terrorism. The only reason terrorism works for terrorists is because it captures people's fear and forces them to change their behavior. The worst thing a government that is supposedly "fighting" terrorism can do, is promote the danger to its people. By doing so, you play right into the hands of the terrorists as they sit back and watch your freedom and peace slip away at your own hands. But the Neo-Cons have done exactly that.

Since the beginning of human history, some politicians have been willing to do whatever it takes to stay in power, even if it means cooperating with the bad guys while pretending to fight them. The truth is, terrorism claims so few lives each year that it is less of a threat to your way of life than pretzels. On average, far more Americans die choking on snack foods each year than at the hands of terrorists. So why are we so easily convinced to give our highest office to an unqualified boob, just because he seems "tougher" in a schoolyard way? Shame on us, we get what we deserve.

It looks as though enough of us have learned our lesson that we will not fall for it again this November, however. Assuming we can keep an eye on the myriad GOP election-tampering operations.

Back to this cartoon: I had a terrific time drawing this one. Designing and illustrating a deviant slug's lair was a kick. Using tiny firecrackers to blow up the salt shaker, the "X" on the garden blueprint, the tiny "to go" packets he's using to fill the shaker, all were jolly little details to think of and draw.

There are six hidden symbols in this drawing and yes, to answer the reader who occasionally complains about this, if I include the same symbol twice it gets counted twice. That's just the way I roll.

By the way, I don't advocate pouring salt on slugs any more than I would pouring acid on babies. Might does not make right, as we have seen on a worldwide scale these past 8 years.

Pat on the Back

Bizarro is brought to you today by Hard Knocks Disco. "Life can be cruel. Dance."

I got a lot of mail from an organization called M.O.T.H. (Mothers of Teenage Hunchbacks) about this cartoon. They made a good point: Hunchbacked children suffer greatly at the hands of their peers – kids being the unrepentant puppets of Satan that they are – and making fun of them in the comics is a slap in the face that they just don't need.

If any hunchbacked children – or "differently-postured children," as they prefer to be called – were hurt by this cartoon, I sincerely apologize. Until I started getting mail from M.O.T.H., I thought that hunchbackism was a fictional malady, like vampirism or erectile dysfunction. I stand corrected.

But the news for these kids isn't all bad. Some companies are actually catering to differently-postured children, and I commend them. (Of course, the rotting carcasses they serve at places like that destroy the environment and damage the child's health, but at least they get a plastic toy.)

Some companies have even issued special toys for differently-postured kids, showing them hitting it off with hot chicks and palling around with so-called "normal" people. Again, my respect for such efforts.

Some professional sports figures have played entire games with the posture of the differently-postured, in an attempt to raise awareness that these kids can do anything anyone else can do. (Except, perhaps, walk across a room with a book balanced on their head, but who ever needs to do that anyway?)

So I'd like to say thanks to M.O.T.H. for opening my eyes to a segment of our society of which I was not previously aware, and also, hats off and a pat on the back to differenty-postured kids everywhere!