Psycho Analyzes

Bizarro is brought today before your face by Signage Improvement.

I'm not sure why I drew myself as the analyst in this cartoon. I didn't really mean to, it just sort of came out that way in the pencil sketch and got even more so when I inked it.

Perhaps it is what they call a "Freudian slip." Perhaps I have a closeted sheep within me that I am afraid to embrace. Buried deep in the cockles of my being could be mounds of squooshy wool and big floppy ears, yearning to bleat and graze and follow the herd from hill to dale.

Or, maybe I am the wolf, wishing I could break the societal constraints of our culture and run naked in the wild, ripping the throats out of weaker beings.

Perhaps I secretly see myself as the table, patiently waiting in silence to offer a sip of water or a tissue.

Or, I'm just an egomaniac who likes to draw himself. Kind of pathetic.


Until next time...if you want to distract the monkeys, you may have to throw some bananas.

CONTEST #3 WINNER

The winner of this week's contest is Joe K. from Illinois. Congrats, Joe, send me your mailing address in a comment (which I won't post) or an email and I'll send you your booty!

It has come to my attention that this contest is too easy. So next week, I'm going to throw a wrench in the works to make it a little tougher for the "flip back and forth between tabs" style competitors. Level the playing field a bit.

Thanks again for playing, a cartoon post follows.

Which late comic will we kick around now?

2009 is a banner year, with both Ultimate Hulk vs. Wolverine & Planetary publishing their long-delayed conclusions.

Which comic will now become the poster child for extremely late comics?

I'm voting for the final issue of Ambush Bug: Year None, which was originally due out in January...

Contest #3

RULES:
1. This week there are 12 differences in the two cartoons below.

2. First person to post all 12 differences in the comments section of this blog wins 5 packs of Bizarro Trading Cards, mailed directly to them from Bizarro International Headquarters in Brooklyn, NY.

3. Winner must agree to send me a picture of themselves with their winnings. (Hey "Tex", winner of the first contest, where's your pic?)

4. Put your mailing address in with your comment, I won't post it. I won't even keep any address other than the winner's, I'm not into collecting addresses.

5. List of differences must be in English to be eligible.

HINTS:
1. Hurry, all winners so far have been in the first five minutes after posting.
2. Click on the images to make them bigger.
3. Do not circle the differences on your computer screen with a Sharpie. I can't see that.

Good luck, and happy hunting.

Finding the Dumb

Bizarro is brought to you today by The Target Audience.

Recently, I received an email from a disgruntled stranger who accused me of being too surreal and confessed to being dumbfounded as to how I ever got syndicated. This cartoon might have had a similar dumbfounding effect on him.

I can understand being riled enough to write to someone to disagree about philosophy, religion, politics, or ethics. But it never ceases to amaze me when someone writes just to tell me they don't "get" my work. It seems a lot of trouble to go to in order to tell a stranger that you don't understand them.

The internet makes cowards into bullies and losers into mob kingpins. It's a small price to pay, though, for instant research at your fingertips and free porn.

BIG CONTEST LATER TODAY...IMAGES POSTED AT 6PM NEW YORK CITY TIME.

Contest Tomorrow

Tomorrow, Wednesday, Sept 9th, is another Bizarro Contest. This time, I'll be posting it at 6pm, Eastern Time (USA), and once again, the first person with the correct list of differences between the two cartoons will win something dandy. Probably some Bizarro Trading Cards, which you can buy for cheap here, if you don't win or don't want the pressure of competition.

Some things to watch out for that previous contestants have fallen prey to:

1. Note the number of differences you must find. It is not always 10.
2. The "official" differences will not be anything so subtle that you have to wonder if it is one of them. Like slightly lighter type on one cartoon than the other, a darker shadow or a slight highlight. It will be obvious things like an object missing or added.
3. Only persons posting their answers in the comments of the contest post will be eligible. Don't email the answers to me or write them in lipstick on a stripper and have them show up at my door.

Thanks for playing our little game. Good luck to each and every one of you.

Looky Here Now

Bizarro has been made possible today by a grant from the Institute for Spiritual Omen Authentication.

Perhaps my favorite kind of cartoon is one that looks like one thing but is revealed to be something else when you read the caption. I think this one achieves that kind of surprise, so I'm happy with it.

Below is one of my favorite attempts at that motiff. You have to look at the pic before reading it for it to work. Click to enlarge it for the full effect.










Tomorrow is another contest and I'm changing some of the parameters, so read the next post carefully if you want to compete.

Until next time... When opportunity knocks, look through the peephole first. It could be opportunity is being forced to knock by an armed kidnapper.