Cracker Leverage

Bizarro is brought to you today by Scary Parrots.


I likely won't be posting much over the next few days during the holidays, so I'm leaving you with what I think is a good one. I confess that this idea came to me while looking at a cartoon in New Yorker by the legendary and brilliant Sam Gross. It isn't a case of plagiarizing since I completely changed the gist of the gag, but it is a direct inspiration.

Even though I don't like or celebrate Xmas, the wife and I spend a few days with friends in the country. It's way fun and nobody plays Bing Crosby's Xmas album.

Hope all of you have a nice holiday, whatever that means to you. I'll post again next week.

Christmas Covers - December 23

Marvelman waves hello to a passing Santa Claus on the cover of Marvelman #71 (1954).

For each day of December until Christmas I'm featuring a Holiday-related comic book cover. (Click on the image to get a larger version.)

Just 2 more 'get-ups' until Santa!

(2008: The Original Black Cat #8)
(2007: Dennis the Menace Pocket Full of Fun #22)
(2006: Girls Bravo vol. 6)
(2005: All-New Collectors' Edition #C-53)
(2004: Impulse #34)

(Polite Dissent's 2009 Comic Book Cover Advent Calendar)
(2009 Comics Should Be Good Advent Calendar)
(Brendan McKillip's Comic Advent Calendar 2009)
(Jon K's Christmas Comics Countdown)

Fire in the Hole

Bizarro is brought to you today by Heartburn.

Here's a cartoon that's kind of lame, really. I guess I thought the drawing was fun because the idea is a little trite. It happens. One of my regular readers emailed me and said he particularly loved this one, though, so I'm guessing it appealed to others, too.

Our Internet is still out so we're looking forward to tomorrow and the rare honor of hosting a Time Warner Cable repair technician in our home. He or she is due between 10am and 2pm, so we're cleaning all day today (and probably tonight) and the caterer is scheduled to show up at 9 in the morning to get things set up. We're so excited!

Christmas Covers - December 22

Betty and Veronica remind Archie (and you!) that there are only 3 more shopping (and kissing) days until Christmas on Stan Goldberg's cover for Archie Giant Series Magazine #501 (1980)

Come back tomorrow, and every day this month, for a new Christmas cover.

Just 3 more 'get-ups' until Santa!

(2008: Harvey Hits Comics #3)
(2007: Marge's Little Lulu #90)
(2006: Dell Giant #26)
(2005: Man-Thing #3)
(2004: Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer #9)

(Polite Dissent's 2009 Comic Book Cover Advent Calendar)
(2009 Comics Should Be Good Advent Calendar)
(Brendan McKillip's Comic Advent Calendar 2009)
(Jon K's Christmas Comics Countdown)

Baby Head Syndrome

Bizarro is brought to you today by Big Babies.

I like putting baby heads on adults. I did it in a cartoon a few years ago (which if I had any kind of modern filing system I'd be able to find and link to now) about a woman who had asked her plastic surgeon to make her look as young as possible. I like both of those cartoons.

But as funny as I think it is in cartoon form, what if that were an actual syndrome that people could have? Their bodies would grow normally but their heads would remain like an infant's. No matter how cute that baby head was, it would not be funny. Just creepy.

Or maybe our instinctive attraction to babies would pull us toward them and the large body attached would simultaneously push us away. Freaky.

If this syndrome does exist and I'm not aware of it, my apologies to anyone reading this who may have or know someone who has a baby head.

Christmas Covers - December 21

Green Hulk and Red Hulk celebrate Christmas on Ed McGuinness's variant covers to Hulk #9 (2009).

For each day of December until Christmas I'm featuring a Holiday-related comic book cover. (Click on the image to get a larger version.)

Come back tomorrow, and every day this month, for a new Christmas cover.

Just 4 more 'get-ups' until Santa!

(2008: Teen Beam #2)
(2007: Bugs Bunny #46)
(2006: Wacky Squirrel #2)
(2005: Archie Giant Series Magazine #15)
(2004: DC Comics Presents #67)

(Polite Dissent's 2009 Comic Book Cover Advent Calendar)
(2009 Comics Should Be Good Advent Calendar)
(Brendan McKillip's Comic Advent Calendar 2009)
(Jon K's Christmas Comics Countdown)

Blue Santa

Bizarro is brought to you today by The Magic of Christmas.

Bummer of all bummers, my Internet is out again. It's a constant problem in our building and Time Warner won't be out to fix it until next Wednesday. Uggh. I'm posting this from my laptop and a weak, stolen signal from a neighbor. It makes it slower and more difficult, so there may not be as many posts in the coming days. And please, don't even think about emailing me.

Here is a little Xmas cartoon for the season. Being a department store Santa has got to be tough. I don't think I'd be very good at it and I know I wouldn't like it. I'm not the sort of person who is good with the public in this kind of situation. I've never worked retail, but I'm guessing I'd last a couple of hours at the most before punching someone and getting fired. Good thing I can draw funny.