Jail Bait

Today's Bizarro is brought to you by Double Entendre Wine.

This is a gag that would not have flown 15 years ago. Newspapers have always been very conservative about the kind of humor that appears on their comics pages. I can't blame them, they know that children read the comics and many parents don't want to be faced with answering what they consider to be difficult or embarrassing questions over the breakfast table. I'm happy to report, however, that in recent years they have loosened their standards somewhat.

I was always honest with my daughters, no matter what they asked, and found that they always accepted my answers casually and moved on unharmed. Contrary to what many parents fear, children do not become promiscuous because they know what sex is, or homosexual because they are aware of its existence, or drug addicts because someone explained to them what marijuana was when they were "too young." Knowledge of a behavior or lifestyle is not what makes a person choose that path for themselves.

More simply, what I've always wondered is why a parent feels they must answer a question they are not comfortable with. If my precocious 3-year-old asked me what this cartoon was about and I didn't want to go to the trouble to explain the concept of penis envy, I'd just say, "I'm not sure. I don't get it either." I suspect that 100% of children would then say, "oh," and forget about it. This seems like a much more logical approach to the situation than writing to the newspaper editor about how offended you were that such a pun was included in the comics page. Choose your battles, that's all I'm saying. And be honest with your kids, then have faith that they'll make good decisions. That's another thing I'm saying.

I did this with my kids and both of them are well adjusted, productive adults. At least they were before they went to prison and I have no reason to believe they won't be when they get out.