Aerial Magic

Today's Bizarro is brought to you by Invisible Planes Aerial Advertising Co.

Since I was a kid, I've always found skywriting and aerial banners fascinating. Especially skywriting – to this day I don't know how a pilot can figure out what he/she is doing when he/she can't step back and look at his/her work. (When are we going to come up with a permanent solution to the non-gender-specific pronoun for situations like this? Personally, I'd be happy to use "it," but then there would people who would be all like, "I'm not an "it"! God made me in His image. Is God an "it"?!" And I'd be all like, "Whatever, dude.")

Here is an unusual aerial banner that I just found. Who spends the money on a message like this? It's got some humor and shock value, but what's the point? There's no arguing that some people misuse Jesus, but it certainly isn't his fault. I see this as misplaced aggression. And what if Jesus had taken it seriously and objected?

Here is another one pulled by an invisible airplane. Clearly, this banner is the answer to a question, but what question? Who gave me herpes?

Here's another example of one that doesn't seem to be advertising anything. And where did they find this giant kid? Wish I'd seen this in person.

This shot is of a normal-sized child pulling a banner, but he can't seem to get off the ground. I have no interest in seeing this one in person.

A less expensive option if you can't afford a plane is this one, where you just wait for people to drive by and read the banner for themselves.

I hope you've enjoyed this exploration of the exciting world of aerial banners.