Gorilla Suits

Bizarro is brought to you today by Johnny Steele. "That's just my name! I'm made of flesh and blood, just like you!"

I was in Oakland, Californy a couple weeks ago doing a show with my good buddy and far superior stand-up comic, Johnny Steele, and he agreed to let me turn one of his lines into a cartoon. Thanks, Johnny! Say hi to Allison for me.

This cartoon gives you another chance to fill the comment section of this blog with our thoughts about vegan vs. meat-eating lifestyles.

Here are some of my comments, based on the myriad comments on yesterday's blog post, "Chicken Chaser."
Some may not make sense without reading those comments first:

By "meant to eat" I did not mean to imply intent, as in creationism or intelligent design. I should have said "evolved to eat."

Though we are classified as omnivores, human anatomy is ill-suited to eat much meat at all and doesn't need any to be healthy. Consumption of animal products (meat, fish, eggs, dairy) is one huge reason why so many of us die of heart disease, cancer, and stroke. Length of intestines, type of digestive enzymes in our stomachs and saliva, shape of jaws and teeth, lack of physical hunting skills, strong aversion to the sight and smell of a dead animal, are all natural indicators that we are not well-suited to meat eating. True meat-eaters are attracted to that smell.

Someone mentioned the postition of our eyes (front-facing) as that of a predator, not prey (side-facing). Our eyes are that of a creature that needs depth perception for living in trees, not that of a predator. Few primates are true predators, but all have stereoscopic vision. Pandas have stereoscopic eyes but are completely herbivorous.

John Mayer's comments on yesterday's post (Chicken Chasers) best represent my beliefs and knowledge on this subject. Check them out, or go to his site: http://www.vset.net

"Personal choice" is a factor in whether or not you eat meat, of course, and some feel that we veg-heads should leave them alone. I never evangelize in person and try not to do too much of it here, but for those of us who do not believe that humans are inherently more valuable than members of other species, there is a "helpless victim of cruelty" issue that makes it difficult to keep our opinions completely to ourselves. We see animals like most people see human children: subject to the same emotions and needs as adults, but unable to procure them for themselves in all cases. So if I assail you for eating meat, it is born of the same impulse that you might experience toward someone abusing a human child. Our rights end where someone else's begin.

It bears noting that evolution takes millions of years for substantial changes to begin to show. Humans were undoubtedly 99% vegan for the vast majority of our early history, like chimps and gorillas, our closest relatives. It was relatively recently in our evolution that humans began to stray away from the tropics, developed tools and language, and began hunting big game. Recent enough that our bodies have not changed substantially since then. Except in this way.

Enough of the serious stuff. How about this?