Rhyming Toast

Bizarro is brought to you today by Greeting Card Hell.

Many years ago, I gave up obligatory holidays and their mandatory cards and gift giving. I haven't given a Xmas or birthday gift nor sent a greeting card since the early 90s sometime. I still occasionally give people gifts or cards when I feel like it, I'm not a cold-hearted bastard, I just resented the social pressure to conform to a scheme designed by department stores and card companies and opted out.

It was fairly simple, really: I told my friends and family that I would no longer be giving gifts or cards for any advertised occasion and that I didn't expect to receive gifts or cards, either. If they still wanted to give me something, I would accept it and be appreciative, of course. I wasn't trying to be mean or stubborn, I just didn't want to play along with Macy's and Hallmark anymore. Many understood, some thought I was being a creep, some probably pretended to understand and called me a creep behind my back.

But the subsequent freedom has been wonderful and I have never regretted the decision. I no longer have to worry what to get people, rush around town looking for something I'm not sure they'll like anyway, pretend to be excited about a gift that I do not wish to own, or end up with a yard sale's worth of gewgaws to dispose of every spring. I'm sure the gifts I was giving others were just as likely to find their way to the sidewalk, so I've saved many other folks the same pointless worry and expense.

My mother-in-law is the only person who still gives me gifts regularly. Happily, she has terrific taste and gives me cool and unusual things that I really like. My wife didn't become the unusual person she is entirely by accident, of course.

Monkey Covers

Sunday is Monkey Covers day here at YACB. Because there's nothing better than a comic with a monkey on the cover!

Chimps, monkeys and apes with guns? They must be guerillas! It's Brahm Revel's cover to Guerillas #2 (2008).

(Standard disclaimer that not all gun-toting primates are monkeys applies.)


Image courtesy of the GCD. Click on the image for a larger version.

Two Cats

Bizarro is brought to you today by TerrifyingCostumes.com

Here's a dandy little cartoon about the Grim Reaper as a cat. It was inspired by the myriad critters my cats bring inside the house to torture to death over the course of the day.

In a very real sense, some people get the cat version of the reaper, dying slowly over time. Others are more fortunate to get the king cobra variety – one bite, dead soon. Personally, I'd prefer to die quietly in my sleep. The "Pillow Reaper"?

While I was away in Californy this week I missed a few postings, so here are two to catch up a bit. The one above is mine, the one below is an idea from my kooky friend Derek, who haunts this blog like the specter of an ancient Scottish king in a drafty castle. BizarroBlog commentators are well familiar with Derek's stream-of-consciousness postings and the challenges they present to readers.

This one of his is an odd idea that just hit me the right way. It is simple, obvious, dry, almost predictable, but those qualities are precisely what I like about it. Some days, simple goofiness rings my bell.

Friday Night Fights: Marion Ravenwood vs. Indiana Jones

From Marvel Super Special #18 (1981). Art by John Buscema & Klaus Janson. Script by Walt Simonson, from the screenplay by Lawrence Kasdan, from the story by George Lucas & Philip Kaufman. (click pic for larger)

Ka-Pow!? Krak!

Pirate Store event in SF tonight is canceled. Stacey's at 12:30 is still on.

Due to circumstances beyond the control of man or beets, the event at the Pirate Store on Valencia in SF has been canceled. Stacey's on Market and 2nd St. is still on at noon-thirty, however. Hope to see one or two of you there.

I'm at a friend's house today without my own computer, so I don't have any cartoons to post. I'll get back to it on Saturday, though. 

Gold Digger #100

I thought it worth noting that today sees the release of issue #100 of Fred Perry's Gold Digger comic. It's actually the 154th issue of Gold Digger, as there was an original four-issue mini-series and a fifty-issue black-and-white series prior to the current color series.

Gold Digger is (as far as I know) the longest-running creator-owned comic series by an African-American; and also one of the longest-running creator-owned and -created series ever--to my recollection only Dave Sim's Cerebus (300 issues) surpases it, and Erik Larsen's Savage Dragon (142 issues and counting) is in the same longevity league. Fred does all the writing and art (including color) for each issue, and it comes out (mostly) monthly. That's in addition to various side projects Fred engages in as well.

With its sprawing cast, dense backstory and mythology, and heavily-stylized art Gold Digger may not be for everybody. But if you appreciate a long-running monthly adventure comic with a singular creative vision, you may want to give it a try (There are numerous manga-sized collections available from the publisher, Antarctic Press.)

Whack It Good

(Click cartoon to enlargerize)

Today's Bizarro is brought to you by Beat it Till it Bleeds Candy Party Supply.

This cartoon idea came from my young protege, Victor. The idea was simple and terrific so I adopted it exactly as he had written it. Though he is but a sapling, he shows great talent and potential. I am proud to mentor him and help in any way that I can, until such time when he strikes out on his own and begins taking clients away from me, at which point I will beat him like a five-dollar pinata. (Anyone know how to make ˜appear over an "n"?)

Until then, enjoy the following video which provides a glimpse of the behind-the-scenes machinations of the cartoon world. To assure that this cartoon would work as designed, I had a prototype built, hired actors in ancient soldier costumes and tried it out, as seen in the video below. Virtually all of my cartoons are researched this meticulously, to assure the utmost realism and highest quality humor that modern technology can provide.



One last behind-the-scenes cartoon note: This is one of those ideas that will occur independently to more than one person on the planet. While building this post, I came across a different treatment of the same idea. (And it's probably not the only one.) Sorry Scott Hilburn, wherever you are.

P.S. Don't miss my pirate store appearance tomorrow night in San Francisco! Sorry for the short notice, I get busy and forget I have a trip coming up until I hear the airport limo honking out front.